Two made one Week 47, 2013

It is necessary to seek the purpose of every devise, for success is found in fulfilling the maker’s purpose and good pleasure. What is God’s purpose in marriage? It is much more than a license for coitus. I make bold to say marriage is no cure for sexual immorality. It helps prevent it alright (1Cor7:2-5), but cannot cure it (ask David: none of his wives kept him from taking Bathsheba).  You will quickly tell me it is to help the man, to remove loneliness. I agree. But there is more. “Ah yes, it is also to protect the woman and provide for her”. Beautiful! But there IS more.

That is why a man will leave his father and mother and be united with his wife, and the two will become one flesh Mat 19:5(ISV).  Listen to the wording: “united”, and “one flesh”. Many people crave marriage partners, fast for that “God’s will” in marriage, but have not worked on God’s purpose in marriage; as though that purpose must automatically happen. Sorry to disappoint you but finding God’s choice for marriage is not in itself the guarantee for marital bliss. Did God not choose Jeroboam? Yet his reign was a colossal failure. God handpicked Saul to be king of Israel yet he was a disappointment to God. Marriage is not a destination but a journey. It is work in progress, not a finished mansion.

God’s purpose is to bring a union, a union that brings His rule and dominance on their sphere of influence. It takes a male and female to bring in the full complement of humanity in the right mix. “The people are one and they all have one language, and this is what they begin to do; now nothing that they propose to do will be withheld from them” Gen 11:6 (NKJV). It appears even the heavens resources are tapped by complete unity: Look how good and how pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity! For there the LORD commanded his blessing— Ps 133:1, 3(ISV). What kind of unity does He require? I appeal to you, brothers, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree with one another so that there may be no divisions among you and that you may be perfectly united in mind and thought 1 Cor 1:10 (NIV). To get one flesh the sperm must first give up its whole body, coat, tail and cytoplasm to unite with the egg. And both must first shed half their inmost beings. It is actually impossible to have this type of unity between those who have yet to believe in Jesus and disciples of Christ: what do a believer and an unbeliever have in common? What agreement can a temple of God make with idols? 2Cor 6:15-16(ISV).  It takes just two who are perfectly united in heart and purpose to get anything and everything they ask God in their prayers (Matt18:19), indeed to achieve things we set out for unity is compulsory. It is this kind of unity that brings about godly offspring. Didn't God make you one body and spirit with her? What was his purpose in this? It was that you should have children who are truly God's people Mal 2:15(GNT). Are you married, yet to wed? Aim at perfect unity to achieve God’s design. There is more.

Starting marriage Week 46, 2013

When is a couple deemed to have married? Is it when the bride price has been paid? Or if a man and woman are living faithfully together i.e. co-habiting are they married? The woman that had married 5 times before and then was living with another man was clearly told by Jesus she was not married to him. You have been married to five men, and the man you live with now is not really your husband. You have told me the truth Jn 4:18(GNB). Faithful cohabitation is not marriage. Both adults must consent (1Cor 7:39), yet more is required.

Parental consent is important before marriage. It is so important that Abraham made it a precondition for Isaac to marry Rebecca: Only then will you be released from fulfilling my oath. However, when you come to my family, if they don't give her to you, you'll be released from fulfilling my oath Gen 24:41(ISV). However Joseph and Mary, ever before any angelic visitation, were very clear on the fact that though they had parental consent, societal recognition, and were even referred to as husband and wife the engagement period was not to have any sexual activity (Lk1:27, 34; Mt1:18-19). Get parental consent; get the blessing of the Lord also. The first marriage did not start with the creation of Eve, but their joyful consent after her presentation by God to Adam.

It is quite common-place for people to refer to themselves (or to betrothed) as husband or wife after the native law and custom rites are done. Many couples have moved in with the excuse the dowry has been paid.  Perhaps our system of credit which permits goods to be enjoyed when part payment has commenced is affecting us. Our transformed bodies are waiting for the time we shall be united to Jesus in the skies and ever be with the Lord (1Cor15:52; 1Thess4:16-17). I want you to note that even Old Testament saints as David regarded bride price as engagement. Then David sent a delegation to Saul's son Ish-bosheth to say, "Give me my wife Michal, to whom I was engaged with a dowry of 100 Philistine foreskins." 2Sam 3:14(ISV).  Marriage does not begin at engagement.

Do judges and magistrates not represent God? I think they would tell you when intending couples stand before them that they represent the state. Court weddings are legally binding, but I expect the disciple to wait for something more: a minister of the gospel’s blessing. I speak to the family of God.  I want state recognition for my marriage, and God is the one who joins us. Jesus says: Therefore what God has joined together… the priest who represents God (Dt17:12) has to make the pronouncement first, thus joining you. Face it, who do we assign the role of representing God when a parent, a judge, and a minister of the gospel all come in a meeting? Beloved that has paid dowry; that has started or completed the native law and custom: you are promised in marriage, there yet remaineth a joining by God. Keep off every sexual activity! Why risk offending God, brethren, and unbelievers for what you will have for a lifetime? Be without offense both to Jews and Greeks, and to the assembly of God 1Cor 10:32(LITV).

Defining marriage Week 45, 2013

Marriage as an institution has been under a lot of strain in the world today, not only in western liberal societies, but also in traditional conservative societies. The very concept has become so warped it is important to restate the author of marriage’s intents. The issues established in the Christian faith are not updated or edited or revised with the times, societies, or civilizations we may meet. No: the Christian faith was once for all entrusted to the saints Jude 3 (NIV). Whilst modernity touches on several aspects of life the Lord points us back to the ancient writings as the unchanging status of marriage before God.

What did Jesus teach? "Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,'   and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."Matt 19:4-6(NIV). Take note of that phrase “so they are no longer two..” please.  Jesus did not say “so they were no longer two..” They are one now as they were one then. The standards for marriage remain as in the beginning. In saying “have you not read that in the beginning…” He means whatever was then (in the beginning) in God’s mind for marriage remains so today irrespective of learning. I hear of theologians coming to a consensus on marital issues. Any consensus differing from Jesus’ established teaching is null, void, of no effect and must be discountenanced.

Marriage is the lifelong union of a man and a woman.  Jesus says the Creator 'made them male and female,'   regarding marriage. Same sex relationships are no marriage and can never be marriage. A man of God said “God made them Adam and Eve not Adam and Steve!” I may add not Agnes and Eve either! Whatever the societal or legal standing of homosexuality, it remains an abomination before God needing repentance, cleansing and transformation by the renewal of the mind. What of polygamy? Jesus did not loosely say “They shall become one”. No. He here explicitly states that “two will become one” not three or more! He also said be united to his wife not wives. Clearly a situation where two men simultaneously take (or share) a woman is equally wrong.

Since Jesus points us back to the origin of institutions, shall we ask how polygamy started? It was five generations from Cain:  Lamech married two women, one named Adah and the other Zillah Gen 4:19 (NIV). This Lamech was ungodly, and a man-slayer as was his ancestor Cain; his example is not to be followed. Marriage begins on a specific date. The date God presented Eve and Adam joyfully received her was the wedding date. He joined them. Has God joined you?

Gone without a trace week 44, 2013

The light in her eyes and joy of face was evident as she spread her hands to give glory to Him who saves to the uttermost. How different from the woman who with sorrow said “Help me!” over five weeks ago. Bitterly she cries in the night, as tears stream down her cheeks. No one consoles her of all her friends Lam 1:2(ISV). She is a widow; her late husband’s relations had not been supportive when he was ill unto death. In fact one of them had already started taking possession of the property before the man died. His illness had sapped their resources: she who used to assist her siblings now turned to need assistance herself. Tears came to her eyes as she considered her state. “It all began when he left” she said. 

An accident following her widowhood left her moving with crutches and an open leg wound. Brethren from Scripture Union rallied to raise money for that treatment. Now many months after she complained there was a painful dark patch at the sole of the same leg. Knowing it could be cancerous she was quickly prepared for surgery and the patch of skin was taken off to the laboratory for analysis. The result was what I feared: Malignant Melanoma. This skin cancer has to be tamed early. If it breaks loose into the body the prognosis becomes very poor. A terminal illness then follows. The report seemed favourable, and the resulting defect on the foot had been skin grafted, we hoped that would be the end. Alas, part of the graft got eaten up by the cancer and another surgery followed. When another growth appeared five weeks back she became sorrowful and asked for help.

Unknown to her the Scripture Union brethren organized a fasting and prayer session for her. She also fasted and prayed with her offspring, and saw what appeared to be a mirror monitoring her, and pot brewing evil for her. No weapon that is forged against you will be effective. This is the heritage of the LORD's servants, and their righteousness from me," says the LORD Is 54:17(ISV).  Being led of God she approached a sister for agreement prayers before this last admission and there realized she had identical revelations with the Scripture Union brethren. Money was again raised and despite the strike she was admitted for surgery. If this failed an amputation might be called for. It was a straightforward surgery and should have had a simple post operative period. When the donor site started having problems it occurred to me Satan was actively fighting this Christian woman and also lifted her in prayers. There is no one like the God of Jeshurun, who rides through the heavens with its lofty clouds to help you Dt 33:26(ISV).  Then came the turnaround: when the change of dressing came up a few days ago the graft and donor site were doing excellently well. As I went through my mail this Friday I came across the latest results of her last surgery. I was excited and went down to the ward to tell her. She danced on the bed as she raised her arms in praise to God. No single trace of the cancer could be detected again.