Welcome to your new life together

Despite the degeneration of this age, which is really not new, the eternal word from God doesn't change.

Jn 15:1-2  'I am the true vine, and my Father is the husbandman;  15:2  every branch in me not bearing fruit, He doth take it away, and every one bearing fruit, He doth cleanse by pruning it, that it may bear more fruit

The husbandman here has a target for the vine, specific plans for interacting with the vine. Whilst it is true the woman was created for the man there are clear expectations, clear plans of heaven for the man to fulfil towards her. Brother, serve as a husbandman in the life of your bride. A cultivator, a gardener, taking care to dress her well. Focus on that. You may say to me this Jn15:1 is not a marriage relationship well listen to Eph 5:28-29 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church

A husbandman nourishes and cherishes the vine. Pruning here doesn’t mean beat her. Not at all, but use your veto power where she enters into unfruitful pursuits so as to cut them off from her. Nothing ever permits or encourages wife abuse or beating in scripture.

 

There are virtues and capabilities in ministry tucked by God into her. Some appear undeveloped, and rudimentary, some might not even be noticed now because they are latent. Cultivate her under God to bring them out, fan them into flame and polish her until they are in full bloom such that everywhere she goes and every one that she meets experiences them, even when such a meeting is for a short period of time.

 

You both read Eph 5:21-33. I believe the order in which things are written there is the order of priority for the man. Putting your wife's needs ahead of yours. Take note that this care is not in response to perceived submission by the wife to her husband. No, this care is in perceived imitation of Christ. As long as you are an imitator of Christ, irrespective of the levels of love and submission you perceive in her, love her! Bring her to bloom. Let there never be a time food is lacking in the home and you go privately to eat outside and expect her to fend for herself. Some men say "I gave you enough money if you have squandered it look to the rest of the week. I'm off to eat. When the week is over come for more money". Not you. That's the purpose God has brought you together.

 

She isn't your competitor in ministry of finance or anything. On the contrary praise and glory come to you as a result of her exploits. Prov31:23 Her husband is a man of note in the public place, when he takes his seat among the responsible men of the land.

(ERV)  Her husband is a respected member of the city council, where he meets with the other leaders.

Di ya bụ onye a na-asọpụrụ nʼọnụ ụzọ ama obodo ebe ọ na-ewere ọnọdụ nʼetiti ndị okenye nke ala ahụ.

 

Now daughter Eph5:22 starts with the woman. What are her own priorities? Prov 31:10-16  An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life. She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands. She is like the ships of the merchant; she brings her food from afar. She rises while it is yet night and provides food for her household and portions for her maidens. She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.

Many feminists believe marriage is a distraction from achieving the full potential of the woman. Not so the Bible. Your husband must come before your household, before the children and other members of the house. Who told you men were created to suffer? Who? And it must never be in his own house. Never take the counsel of those who encourage you to starve your husband of sex so as to punish him and control him. Be generous with your body to him.

Your husband must come first, then the children and cousins e.t.c. staying with you, lastly the job. When our priorities are in order, we see the graces and provisions heaven has placed to make us all we must be in life, church and society. A woman was offered an all-expense paid trip outside Nigeria to pioneer a work in her profession. She turned it down so as to look after her husband. Some felt at that time she was making a mistake. No, she wasn't. I know of a sister, a medical doctor who focused on her family first and when they had come up pressed on to pursue professorship

 

It has been said "If you want to go fast, go alone. But if you want to go far, go together"

Go together into all of God's purposes for you in church, in academics, in profession and in society. None of these and all of these are not as important as your union as man and wife.