Sunday, 19 April 2026

Delivered from suicide Week 16, 2026

 Ps 89:1(KJV)  I will sing of the mercies of the LORD for ever: with my mouth will I make known thy faithfulness to all generations. 

I am Mr. I. C, I ,am 46 years old, and a health worker who gives thanks to God Almighty for miraculously saving my life! I would have taken my own life and been forever doomed but for his mercies. I want to return all praise to the Lord Almighty for His unfailing love. A love that would not let me go.

October 3rd, 2023 is a day I will never forget. It was a day I unfortunately had an amputation of one of my legs. A devastating disease left the health team with no option but amputation to save my life. Sadly, after the procedure, I could not get the full complement of the pain medication as I had underlying kidney problems, and so began a journey of perpetual pain and misery. I had had a kidney transplant following chronic kidney disease. But that is a story for another day. Every twitch of the leg, every change in position, was filled with excruciating pain. All 24 hours of the day - no reprieve.  Sleep fled from me, and nothing could comfort me.

By the 3rd day, I could not take it anymore and resolved to end it all. Being a health worker, the know-how to kill myself was not a problem, and a firm plan of action had already formed in my heart. I am married to an angel of a woman. She is so meek, and when I would speak out or respond harshly, her response was always a meek and quiet spirit. I never let her know I intended to end it all.

The next day was the D- day and I sent my loving, innocent wife on an errand. She got someone, a friend, to tend me while she was away, and I conveniently sent him on an errand as well. Just one injection into my intravenous line would end it all, and quickly too.

Just when I was about to execute my plan, a sister, a fellow health worker whom I had interacted with for basically three times in the last two years, suddenly walked into the ward for a visit! I assumed it was a quick visit, but she got a seat and sat down. smiling sheepishly and trying to start a conversation.

Irritated, I answered in only monosyllables and silence, but she was not deterred. She kept on trying to make conversation, broke out in songs, and just would not leave! Not long afterwards, she began praying. Even when she got a call from her son’s school to come and pick up her child, she still stayed behind until my wife returned! I was so pissed off.

But that night, I managed to fall asleep, and the Lord ministered to me and reminded me of the destination I was heading.  If not for God… 

Ps 103:1-4 (ESV)  Bless the LORD, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name! Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy

CJ is a doctor in the South East

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